the unexpected gift
I've been struggling with the question of appreciation lately. Indulge me in a vignette. I don't know what it means.
I was late to the Auburn courthouse - a courthouse I am totally unfamiliar with (as is the case with every courthouse in the state now) - and I discover, to my horror, the parking lot is totally full. The paid lot next door was one of those where you stick money through a collection slot and just leave, so I needed to have exact change. Since this was 7:30 in the morning and I had never been to Auburn before, I had a hard time finding a convenient place to get change. After driving around aimlessly for several minutes, searching for a Starbucks (aren't they supposed to everywhere around here?), I finally locate a mom-and-pop coffee shop.
I park hurriedly and kind of burst in, somewhat anxious and clearly very type-A city gal in in my fancy dark suit and heels. I ask for a cup of decaf to go. The man behind the counter is nice to me, despite the big cultural chasm and my overall rushed manner. He is good-natured and tells me that he has to make the decaf specially, and starts to do so. I feel it's rude to stop him and say, "Don't bother, I really don't want the coffee. I just want change." And my timing wasn't right, so he starts making the coffee and, of course, it takes forever. I smile a strained smile and try to make small talk, reluctantly. Finally, it's brewed: a single cup of decaf. I offer to pay with a $20 bill. He asks me if I have anything smaller. I apologize and say no. He is so nice, he says, "It's on the house." I insist on paying and he insists it's free, and it goes on like this for a few minutes until the guy next to me in line says he'll pay for my coffee. And I say no, I'll pay for his. In fact, I say, I'll go get change and come back and pay later. But no, no one is having any of it, they're so nice that they insist on just giving it to me, and I don't have to come back. Etc., etc.
Leaving the coffee shop, I am exasperated. I am overwhelmed with feeling simultaneously annoyed and touched. Like God played a joke on me. This was a gift I didn't ask for and pretty much didn't want. At first. But then, driving around to find another coffee shop (a chain store this time) and resigning myself to the fact that I was going to be very late, the meaning of that whole "it's the thought that counts" sentiment really started to sink in. I never really believed in that. But it was such a pure gift on the part of those people in the coffee shop that I needed to just be gracious enough to accept it. And I guess lately, I feel like that's a lot of what life is about.
I was late to the Auburn courthouse - a courthouse I am totally unfamiliar with (as is the case with every courthouse in the state now) - and I discover, to my horror, the parking lot is totally full. The paid lot next door was one of those where you stick money through a collection slot and just leave, so I needed to have exact change. Since this was 7:30 in the morning and I had never been to Auburn before, I had a hard time finding a convenient place to get change. After driving around aimlessly for several minutes, searching for a Starbucks (aren't they supposed to everywhere around here?), I finally locate a mom-and-pop coffee shop.
I park hurriedly and kind of burst in, somewhat anxious and clearly very type-A city gal in in my fancy dark suit and heels. I ask for a cup of decaf to go. The man behind the counter is nice to me, despite the big cultural chasm and my overall rushed manner. He is good-natured and tells me that he has to make the decaf specially, and starts to do so. I feel it's rude to stop him and say, "Don't bother, I really don't want the coffee. I just want change." And my timing wasn't right, so he starts making the coffee and, of course, it takes forever. I smile a strained smile and try to make small talk, reluctantly. Finally, it's brewed: a single cup of decaf. I offer to pay with a $20 bill. He asks me if I have anything smaller. I apologize and say no. He is so nice, he says, "It's on the house." I insist on paying and he insists it's free, and it goes on like this for a few minutes until the guy next to me in line says he'll pay for my coffee. And I say no, I'll pay for his. In fact, I say, I'll go get change and come back and pay later. But no, no one is having any of it, they're so nice that they insist on just giving it to me, and I don't have to come back. Etc., etc.
Leaving the coffee shop, I am exasperated. I am overwhelmed with feeling simultaneously annoyed and touched. Like God played a joke on me. This was a gift I didn't ask for and pretty much didn't want. At first. But then, driving around to find another coffee shop (a chain store this time) and resigning myself to the fact that I was going to be very late, the meaning of that whole "it's the thought that counts" sentiment really started to sink in. I never really believed in that. But it was such a pure gift on the part of those people in the coffee shop that I needed to just be gracious enough to accept it. And I guess lately, I feel like that's a lot of what life is about.
posted by Lisa at 12:07 AM
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